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...Searching For Answers In The Cloudy Sky...

Thursday, July 5, 2012

20 days left ... Life + Love + Goals...

So I have another 20 days of Korea. Having mixed emotions and I realised that so many non-koreans have this feeling before leaving. It feels like the count down is coming to an end. Just like a lot of things. So much has been happening these days. I think these past weeks have been horrible. I realised when you close one door, you also close others behind. But in the end its for the best. Funny that I am upset about it but I can laugh about it too and say I tried. So what happened? LoL... Not many know but the ones that do will understand why I feel upset and sad. Its not all to do with leaving but I do blame it on that. haha! I was broken and ran away from things that happened. So now I am prepared to start my life once again. And I have made up my mind on my goals. I just hope I can cross them off the list. hehe!
Life at times throws you off track and now I am ready to fight for life. haha! If that made any sense. And I am determined to stay single for awhile... haha! 
Yes, I will admit it! I was dating someone but we called it quits. Not ready for serious. Not ready for L.D.R. I will stick to single status. 
Strange what some are willing to do for love. I am hoping one day I will find someone who deserves my love. =X
Yes, dating and seeing someone doesnt mean you love them people!!!
So now you all know... Dont worry.. Kuala Lumpur will fix everything!!! I will be back to normal but you know it. 

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Korea View...

HelloOOoo...


Its been ages again since I have posted anything... on my way to work, so I have time to kill.
So I have spent 11 months here and soon will be leaving for Perth. I was going to stay longer but I shouldnt put my life on hold anymore. I guess I have seen a lot, done a lot and met a lot of people along the way on this journey of mine.

Something to think about... Alone in this country does make you see how much life is better at home. I now know how others feel when they come to Australia with not much or little knowlegde of English. Funny thing about all this experience is how much I have changed and grown. To be told I am brave to face this challenge alone is very overwhelming as many others face more challenging experiences in life. I see beggers trying to make enough for their lives. Looking at many Koreans working their butts off with little rest and not getting paid enough. Its a tough world out there. 

But I must admit its been quitechallenging to entertain myself alone. And many foreginers like myself all face this of being alone..  Shopping alone... Eating alone and etc...
I hear many wanting to leave from bad experiences from their schools and students.
I feel blessed to have a wonderful class. Its small but enjoyable. I have a lot of freedom compared to many of my friends here who must have a job or school work so they can stay.
Speaking to a few friends from my Korean  classes, they told me they were not allowed to Private Tutor. Its very sad that most of them have problems with their Korean Co-Teachers. There is always a communication problem or something else like Students wanting to die due to stress.


I really do feel sorry for those who have to deal with all this.
Another thing that has been on my mind... Is how easy it is to fall in love with a busy city and country... How much I will miss my life here..
I am grateful to those who took me into their luves and made me feel like familu. Super Lucky!
And I am glad that the New Me has eveloved a lot. From Very sad to now a lot happier and grateful for everyday.
I could not have done this without support from my family and friends. Life is good! Love it!

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Life Change...

Hello all...
Its been awhile since I  came on my blog... I so should post up photos from my trips... Hmmm... OK! Will go on face book and steal all photos that I have taken so far... ^^
If you don't know by now... I have officially moved to Korea for the 1 year... And who knows I may even stay longer...
Life here isn't easy but slowly I am understanding everything and starting from scratch in life... In the 4 months of being here I have found happiness and a peace of mind... Life should only revolve around one self... And doesn't end because something didn't work out...
Yes, it may sound very simple but its quiet hard to just switch that switch...


What else is happening... I brought tickets to Hong Kong for CNY... I cannot wait as I miss different foods apart from Korean... ahahha...
Also it would be awesome just to be able to speak some Cantonese and better English then what I have to use here... hahaha
It maybe a cloudy & rainy day outside but I feel great... I can't explain why I feel so happy at the moment but I have glad that my unstable days are over...
Anyways, today we will be road tripping it to Uiseong... Just to visit Handsome for his birthday!!! keke
Went to Mont Blanc and got him a gift... Hopefully he will love the gift I brought... And it should match the Suit his girlfriend got him... keke
bTw... Handsome is like a brother to me... hahha... Funny story as to why I call him Handsome... His real name is San Han... But you know asians... They love saying last names first... So what I heard was Handsome... LoL
Forever now I have called him that... =P
Well its close to 4pm... I have to get ready to go to Uiseong now... Will post photos on Friday... ^^
Until then... Stay safe!!!

Friday, August 19, 2011

Korea...

Hello from Korea!!!
I have been here for 21 days and counting... But it feels like its been longer... I left Perth last month to improve on myself... Life is hard here, not being able to speak Korean or anything else... But I have adopted a family... haha!
So I am being treated well... I haven't really been studying... A little off on Korean at the moment... I think I've just jumped into this and its been a little confusing as to why I am here... It was more simple when I just said it and thought about it... But I am here now, so I guess I have to make the most of it...
I guess I have my up and down days... I have decided not to live in Seoul as its too busy and blah blah blah... Other reasons too... 
I realised I have changed a lot and my thinking is now different... I feel like I have grown a little from this one decision... Yet I am so not ready for this roller-coaster ride...
Anyways, I will overcome this moment... Hopefully... I've meet a lot of people during this trip around Korea... All of which are all good people... Not like some that I once knew... Hence no more Seoul... =X
So where I live now is meant to be the hottest city... It has been pretty hot but  everyday its been raining to cool things down... 
The one thing that annoys me is that they don't sell a lot of the things I use in cooking... So I am missing a lot of home cooking... haha! Yes, I know... I can always order out but I am missing home and it keeps me occupied everyday...
Anyways, hopefully I will study today... I set a goal and I haven't achieved it, so I am disappointed in myself... Everything is just a big change.. My mind hasn't processed this all yet... A little too overwhelming... 
Well time to listen to some Korean music...


xx.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Everything You Do is a Stepping Stone...

I think tonight I've had a real eye opener... I mean... To be asked what do you want??? What do you like??? To be asked so bluntly is a bit overwhelming... But from what I could see from this person tonight... I think she was very transparent... What she thought others could not see, we can all see but she is in denial...
The funny thing about all this is we all agreed on the fact that she is always thinking only within the box...
I personally don't believe life is like a fairy tale, NO MATTER how much one says about their Life, Love and Family... Nothing is Perfect in life...
i think when I said what I wanted in life everyone was shocked... But seriously what's the point in life to set such a high achievement? I believe we should make goals that are reachable... Having simple life, making sure you are happy with a healthy lifestyle... Is that really unbelievable?
Also I now I always think to myself... Why not do JUST DO IT! Seriously? What is there to be afraid of? If you don't try then you will never know the outcome... Correct or Not? This is why some people are so sheltered by only staying within the box... I guess I've learnt a lot from my own problems and just listening to others...
Life is only as simple as you want it to be... Remember that only you yourself can make things happen and change events that happen everyday...
Fate has also been playing on my mind too... Finally I can say that I don't believe much about it... Only because if you think logically about it, that how can something be fated for you if you didn't choose that path in life?
Anyways, tonight I've been told that I have been exposed to many situations and this is why I am the way I am... Like when I say life is not a fairy tale... Many girls get offended by this... I guess I can understand why they like to be blind sited... Its just like how I don't believe in LDR's... Seriously!!! How can it work??? All I can see is that there are many obstacles... If its not enough time to talk or whatever, then its about when am I going to see you again... Or when Marriage becomes an issue... At the moment I really can't get my head around it... But just maybe one day I will try out what it is like to have a LDR... I shouldn't just judge and criticise when I haven't even had one... HAHA!!!
All I have to say is GOOD LUCK to the dude... (already do I feel sorry for anyone who likes me) =X
Anyways, what I am saying is that we should all use the problems and fears as a stepping stone in life.... Try to listen to others problems and analyse it as you might need to refer back to it in life... Don't be one of those selective listeners and dreamers... As harsh as it might sound but this is reality...
And yes, Reality has slapped me in the face again... And this is why I have decided I will no longer even bother this person... Life is too short to get fucked around with...
Well Goodnight all! Gotta get some more zZzZzzz... Before I have to fly out tomorrow! Until then, stay safe and be happy! =D

Sunday, May 8, 2011

FML!!! Is It Time To Cut My Losses???

Just need to get this off my chest... But finding it hard to sleep these days... Easy to wake too!!! Its so bad... And for the past two days, I've been waking up because of nightmares!!! I know!!! Nightmares!!! wTf!!! But anyways, won't get into what happens in the nightmare...
*sighs* I am feeling a little annoyed and soon I just won't give a F#$@K! soon...
Slowly I have noticed after awhile I am the type of person that will ignore a lot of things...
Especially if now I am thinking did I make the right decision??? GRRRR... I feel really stupid!!!
Yes, I know I make no sense! But seriously this person is really pissing me off!!! Mixed messages at the moment...
One moment they are happy!!! And just like a hormonal change of PMS, they turn into a major bitch face!!! Is it wrong if I should just ignore this person from now on??? I mean I am finding this person to be pointless in my life and maybe I should just move on... Cut my losses! I have been told to cut another but now I am thinking this one too... Wasting my F#$@Kin time!!!
And by the way, if you knew me... I hate last minute BS!!! It seems like they cannot make up their mind on something... FML!!! I GIVE UP!!!

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Clearing The Mind...

So a lot has been happening these pass few weeks... A mixture of happy and sad things have occurred... And now I am trying to recover on this stupid cold I think I may have gotten during my travels and stuff...

Anyways, lets start off with all the bad news first! And the only one thing that has been upsetting me is that my dearest and closest friend... Someone who I thought was the only one that I shared many things with is now the one person I hurt the most from... How I feel towards him now is just... Well lets just say our friendship could have been saved... I guess people move on and find new friends to be with...
But on the positive side of things... I finally can cross off Korea on my list of things I must do! HA! The best decision I've ever made and hopefully I will go again soon! I'm already so missing all my Korean friends! They are the most sweet and friendliest people I've ever met! =D
What else has been happening... Hmmm... Well since I've been back I must admit that I have been drinking a lot... Which is not good but the company that comes with it is AWESOME! hehe...
Mind you that I have been drinking during my travels too... And Mr. Shante Lover would know all about it! And Sorry, if you drank a little too much around me! =P
Anyways, I am planning to go back to Malaysia for another quick trip because I felt bad that I left a friend during the weekend! I will party with you this time round! Promise!!!
And the trip to Korea will happen in August! Lets hope I will buy my tickets soon... LOL!!! The flights there are long and tiring... =(
But well worth the trip to see everyone! Missing people really does make you want to see them more... hehe...
And it would be great if I could see *cough-cough* more... ;)
Well its nearly 4pm... So I should get ready to go out soon... Being sick makes everything a lot longer and more effort involved... I wish I didn't have to go out but I do... Oh wells, I will try to enjoy Shilla because I miss Korea so much!!! Just don't know about the company as I don't really want to see this person yet... =X
Anyways, lets hope I come back with a positive outcome that we can save this friendship or not... =)